Do over?

I'm about to become another statistic. I don't know in which category/ies, but I know I will get bad news. Sometimes I wonder how to develop the courage to go on in this life. I have messed it up so badly and my attempts to right my ship as it were seem to drop me further into frustration and futility.

Can I get a second chance with a clean slate? I'll be good next time. I promise. Look, my fingers aren't even crossed.

what a show!